UPDATED: Moses Sauceda, coming December 25, 2016

     I am still trying to wrap my mind around the events of the past weeks.  And I just can't quite do it.  I am still thinking about this baby that we were planning for in February who is now already here laying in the NICU.  He is doing remarkably well for a baby born 7 weeks early, and for that we give all glory to God who has heard and answered the prayers of so many of you faithful brothers and sisters in Christ who have been lifting us up.  That is the only way we are still making it!
     Let me back up a bit.  So we had an awesome visit in Oklahoma and Texas over Thanksgiving and into early December.  We were able to connect with 3 new churches who have committed to be our partners on this church planting journey and we are so grateful for that!  Also, we connected with many of you who are already supporting us and praying for us and we just want to say THANK YOU.  I don't think y'all will ever fully know what your support means and how much of a blessing to us it is.  The Lord is at work here in NYC and we are humbled to be a part of it.  Please know it would not be possible without those of you giving to us and praying for us.  Anyway, so we got back to NYC early December and Jordan had to turn around and leave for Atlanta for a NAMB training conference for 5 days.  He comes home and we turn our attention and make plans for closing on our apartment.  Our apartment that we have been trying to get into since AUGUST!  We finally have the date set for December 22...the date to close and begin moving in and making it ready for a new baby.

     So Wednesday morning December 21, I roll over in bed and there's no mistaking what has happened.  My water breaks.  I had just 5 days prior gone to my first appointment with a new OB/GYN in upper Manhattan.  Since we were moving to the Bronx my plan was to go with this new, and much closer, doctor and hospital.  Seriously, since I've been pregnant the whole time we've been in NYC I've had an unhealthy fear/obsession with having a baby on the subway.  There's been dreams, visions, call it whatever but you guys, I was NOT going to have a baby on the subway.  So we go to the nearest hospital ER, I call the doctors office in Brooklyn who I had just told I was leaving their practice and would not be back, and I prepare to have a baby.

 A man's heart plans his way, 

but the LORD determines his steps - Proverbs 16:9

      I guess a plus side to all this is that I've learned a lot about pregnancy this time around.  For instance, your water can break and you not be in labor.  I had no idea....just always thought if your water breaks that means the baby is coming.  Well the baby was not coming, but with my water broken there's risk for infection so, they tell me I'm not leaving the hospital until the baby comes.  Talk about a bummer!  The day before closing, 4 days before our first Christmas in NYC, and only at 32 weeks...and I'm stuck in the hospital. 

     Well y'all the LORD is so faithful.  Our realtor from the Bronx comes to my hospital room with the papers I need to sign so that Jordan can go to the closing alone on the 22nd.  My mother-in-law and the best Gidgie in the world gets on a plane that day to fly into NYC and help with Maria, Steve with NAMB offers us a spare room here at the David Dean house for Gidgie, and I settle in to my new room at the hospital.  They have told me the goal is to make it to 34 weeks.  Due to the risk of infection but also balancing the fact that we want to keep the baby in the womb as long as possible that is the goal.  Then they will induce at 34 weeks.

     So we settle into the mindset that I will be in the hospital a couple of weeks and then we will induce.  Jordan decorates my room for Christmas, we have a great Christmas Eve party in the hospital, bring all the gifts up to my room to open on Christmas morning, and make plans for Jordan to get our apartment ready in the upcoming week.  I'm not even kidding....Christmas Eve Jordan stays at my room until almost midnight and we plan the upcoming week and what we need to do each day to move into our new place before the baby comes.

I know, O LORD, that our lives are not our own.  

We are not able to plan our own course - Jeremiah 10:23

     Well so Christmas morning I go into labor around 2, finally get the doctors to believe me that I'm actually in labor, they move me around to the labor and delivery area, Jordan shows up, and baby Moses is here by 10 am weighing 5 lbs 7 oz and 18 inches long!  He's a great size for a preemie!  They let me hold him for a bit before taking him to NICU, and then he's gone and I move to my room to recover.  Honestly I did not know what to expect about a baby born 7 weeks early.  But the LORD has been so good to hear and answer our prayers.  Moses was never on oxygen, only on an IV for a few days, and has already been moved to the lowest level of the NICU.  He has been in there a week and 2 days and will be 35 weeks on Saturday which we are on track for to be his release date!

     While I have been spending mornings and early afternoons at the hospital, Gidgie has been staying with Maria, and Jordan and my wonderful parents (who came into town and are staying at our Bronx apartment) are working furiously to get things ready for a mom, toddler and a newborn.  Our heads our still spinning, and I have just thrown my hands up to the LORD saying alright God, I give up.  We'll just take it a day at a time and trust you for the rest.  I've always been the type who wants to be in control (or feel like I'm the one in control).  And the last half of 2016 as we embarked on this church planting journey has shown me that I am anything but in control.  I've always known that in my head to be true, but working this out in day to day life has been tough.  Many, many days have been filled with tears and fear and uncertainty.  It's something that obviously God is still trying to teach me....just to let Him have control of EVERY part of my life.  So here we are....I had so many plans of things I wanted to do for our first Christmas in NYC, time spent with Maria before she's not the only child, plans to set up our apartment for a new baby, and none of that has worked out how I had planned.  

But by the grace of God each day is working out according to HIS plan, and for now I know that's where I need to be.  Because my life is not really about me and my plans anyway.  

-Becky